Relevant to Sleep

Relevant to Sleep

by dan ankers

Some try counting sheep

And I try counting breaths

Cause once the pillow hits my head

My film is playing fast

Like some sort of montage

From every single movie ever made

And some that I’m inventing

‘Cause my brain is unrelenting

There’s times I think, “Now, come on brain!”

What’s the possible relevance of that?

Other times, I just enjoy the ride

“Okay, show me more of that.”

My inner weirdness knows no bounds

Why just the other day

I wondered if the universe were made

Of layers and layers of ecosystems

Extending into immaterial realms

And what if just like we to insects

And them to microscopic life

In planes of ever-more complexity

(And not just size)

There infinite arrays of Un-ordinary life-forms

That Thrive

And this is just a small sample

A smidgen of an example

Of what happens to me

Even before

I catch my Z’s.

The Mighty Terror

The Mighty Terror

-For Lukas-

All beware The Mighty Terror

He comes to fight the noble knight

Who rides upon his loyal horse

A black one with a suit of armor

The loyal horse, whose name is Charmer

The noble knight is called Sir Crusher

Because one hand is giant-sized

And with it, he can smash a boulder

And hold a sword that's ten feet high

With a blade that's two feet wide

The Mighty Terror is a legend

And no one really knows just why

He loves destruction, screams, and mayhem

They guess he's just an awful guy

Onto our story, that’s in progress

Get ready for a crazy ride

As our hero speeds into battle

With his axe, to start attacking

Over a hill, they see him coming

The Mighty Terror has no horse, he's just running

With pitch black armor

And curved blades in both hands

Forty feet high, is how tall he stands

And now he's mad

And now he's running

The Mighty Terror

Is not funny

Sir Crusher calls to Charmer

"Charge!"

The mighty steed begins to gallop

Toward the Mighty Terror's hill

They're gaining fast, he is not far

They will begin a test of wills

Who can last upon this field?

And who will be the first to yield?

The Mighty Terror slashes first!

As our hero's duck and get away

Charmer runs up right beside him

And kicks the Mighty Terror's leg!

Who almost falls but only wobbles

But now he’s hurt, they see him hobble

The Mighty Terror charges forth

He is angry, and wants to kill the horse

But Charmer’s fast and he is slow

So the horse evades the killing blow!

Even so, the swipe of that giant’s sword

Cuts through earth and shakes the soil

Knocking Sir Crusher off his faithful horse

Now he’s a little scared, of course!

But he’s a knight, it doesn’t matter

He rushes toward the limping monster

And throws his axe, at that black armor

It bounces off like it was rubber

So he spins around the Terror

Pulls his sword, and aims between

The sheets of armor that cover this huge being

And with his ten foot chopping sword

Sir Crusher swings like never before!

He misses! Barely makes a dent

Hits the Mighty Terror’s chest

And now the Monster’s quite annoyed!

He will make sure they’re both destroyed!

He swings his fist in the knight’s direction

With amazing force and a furious scream!

Which hits Sir Crusher and smashes his armor

Rips it from his upper body!

The Knight is hurt, he’s barely standing

Sir Crusher’s taken quite a pounding

Just then he sees his Charmer racing

He will not let the Giant harm him!

And just in time the knight is rescued!

Sir Crusher mounts the horse’s back

While the giant swings his curved sword

To cleave Sir Crusher, clean in half!

And now the two have noticed that

The Mighty Terror swung so hard

With so much rage and so much power!

That his blade is now lodged into the soil

And he cannot pull it out!

Charmer gallops and leaves his master

Atop The Mighty Crusher’s back!

Where he climbs further up the monster

To where the giant’s helmet is at

He grasps it with his crushing fist

His right hand just to be specific

And pulls the monster’s helmet off

And all the armor crumbles with it!

Piece by Piece, the metal falls

Only there is nothing underneath

All that’s left is a pile of gigantic sections

But no Mighty Terror could be seen!

That’s when out from between the breastplate

Where would have been the giant’s chest

Crawled out a tiny, frightened field mouse

Who scurried off...never to be seen again!

The horse and master were relieved

As I guess you can imagine

The Mighty Terror was little more than Magic Armor

That a field mouse must have crawled within

So, they hung that Magic Armor up

And locked it tight inside the castle

Keeping all the little critters out

In order to again avoid this hassle

And so goes the legend of the Mighty Terror

And Sir Crusher and his horse named Charmer too

The bravest heroes who ever fought a field mouse

Who stuck together, cause that’s what best friends do.

THE END

Brother of Mine

Brother of Mine
-For Lukas-


Brother, my brother, when will I see you?

When can I hug you, kiss you, and squeeze you?

Where will I be, when you say your first word?
Will you be like me, or have wings like a bird?

Brother, my brother, I hope you like playing.
I know that you will, but I just feel like saying it.
I'll teach you my moves, and all of my skills.
Well, maybe not all of them. Yes, I'll keep a few.

Dear little brother, I know you'll like Lucky.
He's brown and he's fun and he's the size of a puppy.
I know he'll be excited, like me, just to see you.
My only concern, is that he might try to eat you.

Dear little brother, I was only just kidding.
I know you'll love mom, she's a nurse for a living.
And daddy's great too, he helps uncle Mike.
And we're a great family, the kind that you'll like.

I can't wait to teach you, all the things about life.
Like drawing great pictures, and riding a bike.
Maybe you'll have an office, like I did once too?
Maybe you'll be obsessed, with heavy things too?
I hope you play sports, and are great at them also.
I know that I am, I can teach you to be awesome.
I can teach you my jump shot, and my dribbling skills.
I can tell you about Carmelo, and the Knicks and the Phillies.
I can transfer all of my tricks and abilities to you.
I know I said I'd keeps some, but I was just kidding.
I hope you're funny like me, and you laugh and get silly.
Brother, oh brother, just please hurry up.
I just can't WAIT to see you!
Enough is Enough!

Unbridled Life-poem for a friend

Unbridled Life
by dan ankers
(A birthday poem, to a friend)

First shower of the morning is blessed

If baby soundly sleeps in bed

But often enough, and more so than not

Day begins with screaming tot

...But it's not a bad thing, either way

Just different paths to the same end

The Drive to work; I can't be late

Diane hates that sort of thing

There's traffic jams and workers blocking

Headlights out? This lukewarm coffee!

...But it's not such a terrible shame after all

Just different ways to roll the ball

Get to work with minimum hassle

Patient's late, he's such an....Apple!

Oh well that's to be expected

Prob'ly someplace eating breakfast

...But it's no great crime

Just another way to pass the time

Home at last to hang with baby

What a pleasure, this little lady

All hugs and smiles and magic grins

Her hair is full of tonight's Din-Dins

...But it's never a bad thing to stay with her

Just the best, yes I prefer

Spend some time with Mr. Hubby

And watch the angel as she sleeps

Prepare for a new day, this all over

Once that's done, go count some sheep

...But I would not have it any other way

This is how I spend my day

This is the life that I prefer

Just him and me and little girl

Pandering of the Lyrical Kind

Pandering of the Lyrical Kind
by dan ankers

Pandering, meandering around a point
I'm clever, so I want to fit in, in this joint
Speaking words that crackle with mediocrity
Selling it to others, who swallow it shockingly

Mystery, Mystery

Mystery, Mystery
by dan ankers

Mystery, Mystery
Grace of history
No one knows the face of this story
All who claim to, have an agenda
Pulling tricks, like The Flying Wallenda's

I myself disgrace these theories
Since, from birth, they've been aimed at me clearly
Injured by some and dodging many others
I'm weary from fighting deceitful "brothers"
"Sisters" too
I want to start over
Shiny and new

The first place to start
Begins with this mystery
Embracing myself
And my place in this history

And by not reacting to the past
We create anew, society at last

Others will come and attempt to coerce us
Snakes in the grass, intending to charm us
Not with an apple, or the promise of knowledge
But with the concept, of comfort and solace
All the while, their intention is power

Others too, will claim to have answers
Assuring that knowledge is their sole advancement
Born in the pits of relentless sorrow
Their only advancement is the rape of tomorrow
Distilling wonder into beakers and numbers
They've lost the fact that our mystery calls

Still others will come, with eternal answers
Stealing our mystery with placating cancers
Telling us that our perceptions deceive us completely
Stealing our thoughts and emotions
Washing them and giving them back in vague potions
Power is their motive as well, but fear is also
The lesson they sell

I urge you to avoid these common pitfalls
That is all

Embrace yourself
Embrace your life
Embrace the mystery
Your place in history

Swimming

Swimming

by dan ankers

Waves crash against my head

As I prefer the deep end

As deep as I can go really

The ocean, tempted to swallow me whole

And I, tempted to allow it; to lose control

Yet the ocean allows me to float

And I still swim, because that way looks grim

Always though, that temptation is there

And the ocean flirts with submerging my hair

Waves

Little ones out here

Cresting and crashing with singular flair

Beating against reason with unanimous volition

Attempting to cash-in on my curious condition

Waves, from me

Going out into the sea

Irregular in pattern

A precocious use of the atoms 

Not like the sea at all, very self involved and free

Because I am me

What the sea does not know

Is why I choose to go

Anywhere I want to be

Even sometimes, out into the depths of itself

Wincing over Time, Space, and No-Place

Wincing over Time, Space, and No-Place
by dan ankers

A symphony of instances, causing winces
Flash-forward only a couple more, and I have forgotten them, like symptoms of sicknesses gone by
And now that they're gone, I shall move on
Experiencing these instances, so relentlessly
Impressing me daily, with their ferocity, and oftentimes their oddity
My commodity
My secret philosophy

Coping

Coping
by dan ankers


Coping, we must be joking
Why, Out of all the infinite ways
To go about our nights
And power through our days
Do we decide clam up
And barely manage getting by?
I see so many of us in the streets, it makes me start to cry

I think it takes a strong will
To live without a shell
I know sometimes it's necessary evil
Cause life is living hell
For some folks more than others
My sisters and my brothers
And if I had my druthers, we'd all be living well

Don't confuse my words; I am not judging
That's not within my rights
And I'm guilty of this sin more than I am not
As I narrow down my sights
But sometimes when I'm out and driving
Or walking down the street
I see so much potential for living, and I see my own conceit

Written upon other peoples faces
I see my own prideful disgraces
And I, too, see my fear
And it makes me want to act upon my insight
But the way is not quite clear
As I know I'm not alone in my explicit vision
I must for now just hold a mirror
Up to my own, compromised face, and be a better man from here

The Subtle Insanity

The Subtle Insanity
by dan ankers


Boxed up. I'm locked up
Within a cage of my own making
Life is out there for the taking
And the giving
Precious living
Life is all we have ever known
"I'm underwhelmed."
"It's overblown."
Should not be a way of living life
Yet it's so easy to fall prey to the habit
Of wasting priceless days
And taking life for granted
Go find another planet
If you could build this better
Of course, I'm speaking only of myself...
My wasted days are bountiful and tragic

There's a Character

There's a Character
by dan ankers


There's a character you never learned about in school
When you're down in the dumps and you're made into a fool
And no one tells you where or when and you get stranded
And not one teacher for the kinds of things you are demanded
There's a character for whom nothing is scripted
Where your own internal essence must be drafted
As you attempt to pen your own triumphant glory
And get along with your fellow authors too
Who, themselves are writing the tale of their own mortality
Playing that character, to the best of their ability
While some will write a vicious story of abuses and crimes against humanity
Others, still, get lost within the depths of their insanity.

Surety

Surety
by dan ankers


Surety is blurry
And words can be disturbing
I wish I knew, or could pretend
Like others seem to do
But not if you ask them
I seem to look past them
And if I do, it's only because I'm wondering too
Only words can be blurry
Disguising insecurity, alarmingly harming me
With their deceptive surety
Which, if seen psychologically
Is hogwash, categorically
And cannot be distinguished
From noises
Alluringly
Set to the sounds
Bells, wind-chimes, nice rhymes, symphonies
Man-made creations, set to rhythms of human impurity
Ensnaring the masses
With all manner of
Buffoonery

When there is so much out here to be discovered
It's sad really
And when you're looking at the big picture
Human life is little more than an offhand whisper
But precious (if flimsily wrought)
It deserves more awe and consideration than this
Than the clumsy words we carelessly toss
Like logs into the fireplace of human kind
So are these ideas and thoughts
Which cannot even begin match
The wonder of my own mind
Which, itself, is at a loss

Growing Up by the Beach

Growing Up by the Beach
by dan ankers


Gulls seesaw back and forth
in the sky

Their shadows flicker on the sand

I barely notice as I play with my plastic men

And pile shovelfuls of tan grains without care

As the water of the ocean, like a metronome

Rushes languidly, and still lazily recedes

I have all that I have ever needed to know or wanted here
with a bucket of these elements between my knees

The horizon is the furthest thing I recognize
It represents eternal things to me

My liquid vision harbors gentle thoughts
whose perfect flow contrasts the grains of sand

That spill off of my shovel, row by row
slipping from the plastic grip of man

Time in its varied contributions
to my young self represented, at the shore

The sand, the breeze, the pulsating contractions
my virgin little mind could not ignore

The Pile of Ugly

The Pile of Ugly
by dan ankers

Once there was a pile of ugly, loaded up so high
That it marred all of existence, and sore was to the eye
And so the people packed their bags up, and drove off with their kids
In search of some anointed haven, where maybe they could live
And where there was no pile of ugliness to grapple with

As they drove a thousand miles, and their kids played hand-held games
The parents thought to wonder, from whence that refuse came
But drove it from their minds, for thinking was displeasure
And played the mind-held game, disparaging forever
Never truly living, always feeling clever

However there was one man, who watched as they drove away
He'd never felt like them at all, so why should he follow their migration call?
He knew very intimately, just what that pile was made of
He'd seen them load it up, with the ugliness that was
Their truest contribution, to human evolution

The man was sure they'd do the same thing, anywhere they went
Just looking the other way, whenever they saw fit
For that view was always nicer, and that way carried pleasures
Ignoring the alternative, of dealing with their ledgers

When they'd gone, the man, he sadly sifted through that pile,  dejected by this world
For among its heap he saw the hopes and dreams, of the parents of those little boys and girls
Who now drove off in a new direction, to heed the siren's call of willful incomprehension
With the steel-toe of his boots he kicked aside, yet another thought they'd hoped to bury and hide

Unanimously it seemed away they'd thrown, the belief in other's suffering save their own
And outside of their great town, their stood alone, throngs of hungry people with no homes
Who had to view that pile of ugly too, whose minds seethed with a rage they never knew
And whose bellies were seized by hunger, for which they didn't care

All this searching drove him to despair, as he wept at the foot of that pile and wailed into the air
He wept for those people he'd come to hate, who shunted him aside for keeping his faith
An carrying it around with him, his own pile of trash, instead of disregarding it, he left it fastened fast
His ugliness, his faith, his hopes and dreams, and all the things that he believed it meant
To be human in the first place, and he carried it wherever he went
And he resolutely believed that they should too, and so resolutely now, he knew what he would do

The man found an abandoned semi truck, unloaded it and readied it for his haul
He combed that massive mountain for it all, their hopes and dreams
He crammed it totally full, so there was nothing else he could squeeze
He honked the air-horn once, as he drove away
He knew if they couldn't accept him, he would accept them anyway

He would find the people who'd abandoned this town
And return to them the treasures that he'd found
And teach them not to look the other way
And treat their own emotions like decay
Or to forget that others here deserved life too
On this massive ugly world with me and you

As he drove away, he left open the gate
To all the folks outside, who hadn't ate
Or slept on a bed in quite a while, if ever at all
Telling them that there was plenty, just remember to keep empathy
And remember not to close this gate ever again

...And on that pile of ugly there did sprout
amidst the fertilizer of emotion
a single tiny flower of devotion
whose speck would soon erupt into an ocean.

Fenced in Freedom

Fenced in Freedom

by dan ankers

You would chain the sky and drain the sea

All in the name of safety

You would block the rivers and soften the light

All in the name of your fearful plight

You would tame the animals, the people too

All in the name of keeping you

(Cause let's face it, that's really what this is all about)

Feeling good in your wholesome tomb

As long as these things happen in your sight

It matters not that others have to fight

To see the sky

To wet their lips

To taste the freedom, inherent this, to all the people's 

By virtue of being human

The freedom too, to live this terrible delusion

The Leech

The Leech
by dan ankers

He'll creep up when your back is turned, The Leech will come to claim you whole
Under canopy of night, he'll pilfer your immortal soul
Three fingers on a slimy hand
Reaching out to snatch your light
For human essence, he's insatiable
Robbing babies' nurseries at night

And when he's claimed enough, be certain that
He will cart this ample bounty back
To his fav'rite place under the skies
The hall of broken bones and goblin's cries
Where the suffering souls will power lamps
That allow The Leech to view his past
Back when he was not so awfully bad
Back when all five fingers, on each hand he had
Back when he too had the flicker of a soul
Back when he knew more than just a void of pain and cold

So, now he nightly shuffles round the world
Extracting people's nuclei like pearls
Carrying on his back a bottomless sack
With screams erupting out to put them back
A soul without a body is a crime!
Please do put me back, I had more time!

And yet again, they will burn his lamp
Where in desperate visions, haunts his past
The family he gave up for an immoral goal
He murdered them that night to play his role
And since became the ghoul that we all know
The monster with his precious sack in tow

True Night

True Night

by dan ankers

Darkness without boundaries

True night has finally found me

No longer sleeping soundly

True death, there's nothing left

My world is made of shadows

No longer feeling sad though

In mist formed out of whispers

And ghostly apparitions

With my awareness slipping

And the old me sloughing

Just slipping off my bones

And falling to the floor

I dawn into a new day

Of onyx colored decay

And masters who are tailored

And suited to this light

I feel their waves engage me

The tingles of their skin is now the suit I wear

My smile is always present

Electrified despair

By the time of human herd

I am just another bird

Flocking singly through the throng

Unbeknownst to all

My cheerless disposition

My dark, raging condition

My heartless inhibition

My total darkness fall

Raging

Raging
by dan ankers

Distant clouds above
remind
Of raging wars
waged in the sky
Or thought balloons
just tethered their
By cosmic strings
of angels hair

Originating not
within our realm
But from beneath
the withered elm

Beneath its roots
which frame our universe
And extend into that place
outside of time
Are waters that flow
where we have never known
That cannot be perceived
with feeble mind

Only when we cross
the river Styx
And die unto ourselves
may we see this
And celebrate alone
what there we find
A universe
unmarred by human kind

Always Another

Always Another
by dan ankers


Help me. Release me. Someone...
from the iron grips of time's many tiny hands
all working in unison to dissolve the oneness of my mind
Pulling it into pieces
what once was inexpressively broad
and immeasurably wide
Take from me the conscious ego halls
where once I called a meeting of them all
and all came
And now, without desiring a name,
I rise
wishing to be greater than I think I am
For thought is not the truest measure of a man
tis only an expression of myself
in that hall
with them all, with all of their words
...fucking turds
And so in anger
I storm out
Leaving all of them to think
What was that all about?

Every Sound

Every Sound
by dan ankers


This passion I have found
(endangering sleep)
loves moonlight much more than the sun

It wills itself upon my waking mind
saying, "carry on, carry on!"

The Night (from behind our conscious door)

The Night (from behind our conscious door)
by dan ankers

The night, her darkness creeps
however playfully
full of smiles and ruby lips
containing mayhem, in her kiss

With no regard for the daytime or the moonshine
she works out of her own mind
dancing adroitly between the two
and never having been seen by either one

Her ebony skin is silken
Her polished smile, deliciously unnerving
Her fun is not for everyone
and she will eat the undeserving

Where they will awake in the light of day
never the same, their innocence lost
no longer believing in the darkness or the grey
but clinging to the bright lights, at any cost

Or else they will become harbingers of shadows
assimilated by the creatures there
no longer a part of her, either
for she is not a creature of despair

She is merely a warden of the unseen
ambivalent to petty things, like love or greed
She is above such whimsical heights of emotion
orchestrating from behind a veil of such devotion

Neither the sun or moon have any clue of what her name is
to them she is the beating heart of strangeness
and since they have never seen her at any point
in misunderstanding, she's dismissed  of no import

Though I assure you she's greater than either one of those
either the gentle moon or the sun's overbearing glows
For within her contains the backdrop of our very souls
our private essences that only timelessness knows
and even then we can scarcely divine, from whence she came
and like the sun and moon, we are ignorant of her true name

If only she would grace us to reveal
the significance of her import, I do feel
within my triffling, pathetic human mind
that somewhere from her words she could reveal
a comprehensive truth, all too real
combining both the darkness and the light
into the permeating backdrop of the night
to unify the pieces, once more
as it was, but truly always will be
behind the door

Morning

Morning
by dan ankers


Morning comes
the buzz-saw hums
whoops you call those birds
My head is sore
it's after four
and now the sun it yearns
To be renewed
receding moon
the day calls out her name
And with a roar
she can't ignore
the sun shall have his way
But afterlong
he'll soon move on
her time will come again
And if the trend
nocturnal zen
this evening follows I
I will be there
to watch her fair
white figure cross the sky